Stage 15 - Parades

Someone turned the oven on. It was 90 degrees at 9:00 am when I set out. At mile 50 a sign at the bank said it was 94. But of course it’s a dry heat, so nothing to worry about.

Today’s route was northwest to Hartford, south to do a loop at Holy Hill (our version of the Pyrenees), southwest to Hartland, east to Sussex, north to Menomonee Falls and northeast home. A total of 60 miles, which was 3 miles short of today’s goal. Still, I’ve gotten through the second week of this thing and tomorrow is a rest day (Yippee!).

The town of Sussex was hosting a parade today and because of my inflexibility in adjusting routes I was forced to ride three blocks along the parade path. I wasn’t happy about it but the people were nice and many even clapped. I should probably learn how to execute the royal wave (see photo, above).

North of Sussex I rode through another parade, the Miracle Homes Parade of Homes. A parade of homes is where a homebuilder has a bunch of model homes close together so prospective buyers can view them all in one visit.

If you live in the Milwaukee area you are sure to be aware of the Miracle Homes radio ads. The ads use the voice of the owner and the tag line at the end of every ad is, “Miracle Homes, a Christian based company”.

Isn’t this using religion for financial gain? And what does ‘Christian based’ mean anyway? That they sprinkle holy water on the building materials? That they pray that the house won’t fall over? That they hope that you think they are better than other builders because of some inside connection to Heaven?

I’ve always felt that most mainstream religions were (or should be) based on ethical systems that promote being good for the sake of being good, even when there is no reward.

If this really were a Christian based company they wouldn’t need to tell us about it, ad nauseum. Being true to your faith is in the way you live, not in how you say you live.

This isn’t the first (or last) time that some business venture used religion for financial gain. They’ve got an infallible partner (Jesus) who doesn’t take his cut. It’s nothing more than clever marketing designed to mislead, and when St. Peter comes a-callin’ I hope this little stunt is on the tally sheet.

Maybe we could turn this into a movie. We take the above scenario but inject a little mysticism and action. The angel Gabriel comes down with some hit men who look like 1930’s Chicago land gangsters in an attempt to teach these businesses a lesson. Here’s a snippet of the dialogue;

Setting: Tommy, the business owner (played by Burt Reynolds), is sitting behind a large desk in a high-rise office building. Gabriel (played by James Earl Jones) and the boys appear out of thin air in front of Tommy.

Tommy: Who the Hell are you? (Tommy stands quickly)
Gabriel: Are you Tommy?
Tommy: Who wants to know?
Gabriel: J.C.
Tommy: What’s he want? (Tommy’s face, although he’s trying hard to look unafraid, goes white)
Gabriel: You haven’t been giving your partner his due.
Tommy. Yea? And what’s his due? (Tommy’s hand slides slowly into his coat pocket as the hit men lean closer)
Gabriel: J.C. says ten percent. (Gabriel turns up the collar of his overcoat and straightens his shoulders)
Tommy: Ten percent! Are you kidding? What’s J.C. ever done for the business? (Tommy’s eyes dart between Gabriel and the boys)
Gabriel: Tommy, I think you’ve forgotten how all of this began. (Gabriel moves toward Tommy)
Tommy: Listen pal, I’ve got lots of problems here and I’m not interested in what J.C. wants.
Gabriel: Maybe you should be, Tommy.
Tommy: You tell J.C. that if he wants his ten percent he can bring his sorry behind down here and try to collect it himself.
Gabriel: If that’s the way you want it Tommy.

Tommy quickly pulls out his gun and starts firing but Gabriel and the boys dissolve away.

Thus begins Tommy’s internal struggle over right and wrong. Money and power vs. doing good. Car chases, beautiful women, exotic locales, bad guys, good guys, angels, devils and a priest. This movie would have it all.

In the end Tommy makes the difficult but right decision to donate his entire empire to Habitat for Humanity in hopes of paying his penance and getting into Heaven.